One common reason is that they simply grow apart. He will miss you so much and he will realize what he has lost, how much he misses you andvhe will be back begging for you to forgive him and through this he will have grown up and he will see that you are a lot stronger than he ever thought you were and he wont do this ever again. Im thinking in the beginning its a rebound. He also said he feels like he cant make me happy as I always moan at him and that his friends have said its so much easier not having a girlfriend. Well, it can be called the Situationship.. He talks about the breakup all the time and now seems upset that I am doing ok. What should i do? Unless you have a shared responsibility that requires you pick up the phone at all hours (kids or a business), do yourself a big favor and ignore any late night texts or calls from your ex. Even after a romantic relationship ends, we might still be interested in staying connected. Even though I genuinely enjoyed his company the 3 times I met him, it was a dead giveaway that my ex was not ready to talk to me yet and had sent in his friend to see what I was up to. Over time, people change and evolve, and their interests and values may no longer align. Some folks just are looking for a cheating loophole. We had a great relationship, strong connection and went throw a lot. Your ex stays in touch with your friends and family. The idea of the pendulum swing is very important to understand here. He just doesnt want to even try now. My ex and i ended on bad terms he was leading me on and ended up dating someone in less than a few days after the break up, at first he liked all my instagram pictures but i stopped liking his pictures since the day we broke up cause he blocked me after leading me on and also unblocked me after that and now hes stopped liking all my pics too. Then it is my turn to talk about my feelings, I start off with the way you handled the break up was really immature. she recently broke up with her boyfriend too, they working together nearly every day over an year but just now started to seeing outside work. Says hes confused because when he moved out he thought I didnt love him anymore. When I had my breakdown, he was right there for me. It was just convient for us all to go to make it in one trip so we wouldnt back track and spend more money. My phone was off for 3 days because I forgot to pay my bill so we didnt get to talk much. But we never fought, never had any real issues before this. If you are in the middle of a no-contact rule when your ex is reaching out, then you should ignore him, unless he flat out says he wants you back. When he left it broke ny heart so I feel like I have no choice but to move on. Oh my My ex is still in love with me according to your list!!! I still want to be with him and dont know what to do. Quiz: Do You Still Have a Chance With Your Ex? He still tells me everything. And like I just said, your exes reasons for getting in touch with you might seem weird, like texting about how they found your socks under the bed. My ex and I split up mutually, he then told our child he had met someone new two weeks later ( Im sure he overlapped a month maybe two before we split) upsetting herasking her if she wanted to meet her? Low to NC sounds good in your case since you need time to heal and seem so upset. So he said to save himself from the potential heartbreak he decided to cut things off. 6. He replies so quick and so brief and when we first broke up September 2016, he reached out one time to say hey My most recent ex never did and when he does reply it is dry as fuck.. He is now in a relationship and in 2 weeks she lives with him. Pretty much every day. He is the one who wanted out of our marriage. You can get back to them the next day. We have been together for 5 1/2 years there was no real reason for the break up. It looked like he was about to cry and actually starts banging his head on the middle armrest in our friends car.. My friend comes up and says lets go and give him some space, my ex yells she doesnt get what space means! Im like huh? he follows me around for a whole hour and yet im the one that wont give him space? I dont know what in the world Im supposed to do because I still love him with all my heart. Women often break up and move on when they feel like they have tried everything to make the relationship work. And honest to God, he seems not to understand. After a relationship ends, knowing how to act around your former partner can be difficult. Because I know him so well after 6 years I do know that he is very confused with life in general with his job, finding himself and feeling good about himself again. Your ex has been going out and/or drinking a lot. Im at a loss. Im so conflicted because some people say give him space and time and hell come around but I feel like the longer I wait the more I lose him. People with no feelings for their exes often cut ties and move on. We ended in good terms, so we maintained a lover/friends relationship while being "single". In such cases, we might still continue to act like we did when we were a couple because we still share a special bond with each other. I was not the one to call or text. were the 3 times he reached out the past year and a half. By clicking Sign up, you agree to receive marketing emails from Insider I've been crying for the past few hours and now I just feel emotionless. I feel looking back like it was the right move now. It can also help us recover from the relationship we once shared. 14. You'll feel stronger and more empowered, and that can make it easier to deal with the emotions around the breakup. All is said was lmao which is considered dry so he only opened it. We are great together and laugh most of the time, i just wonder what the caution block is for me. He said he just doesnt know and he doesnt want me to leave he loves me but is just conflicted. I told him I was deleting and blocking his phone number. He wants to remain really good friends. He has told me he loves me a couple of times. But how can you tell if there's a chance you might be able to or should try to rekindle things with your ex in the future? He posts pictures and messages all the time, says he is so happy, yet he can't completely let go of me. ???????????????? We broke up but still act like a couple- what it means: After a relationship ends, knowing how to act around your former partner can be difficult. I havent talked to him since then which was about 5 days ago I havent texted or called him thats the longest we have ever gone without talking. I was completely confused at the time about why this guy I barely knew was going out of his way to awkwardly make conversation with me. I dont want to but I dont know what to do or say to fix us. It could be how we look at each other, talk together in public, or share a gentle hug that might signify we are still close. It wasnt that i didnt totally love her, i did, it was just that she was so cold and dark about it all that it kind of shocked me and later (quite quickly) made me see another side to her personality, a side i didnt want to be with. Of course, they wont always be having three-hour chats with you, and they might even go away for a day or two. I just put on a brave face because I dont want to break down in front of him but all I really want to do is call him tell him how much I love him but I simply cant bear the thought of him rejectimg me. You need to put some work in for your ex to put you on a pedestal again! Its just that the advice I provide here is only snippets, tailored to individual situations when I have the opportunity to respond. I admitted what I did wrong and took steps to prove I was not talking to this person anymore or hiding anything. For example, if we shared a lot of expenses while living together, we might still need to share financial responsibility to maintain our lifestyle after breaking up. But being civil, having catch up coffee, chatting im good with all of that. Breakups arent always permanent, and these signs are a great estimate to judge if your ex is regretting the breakup: By Chris Seiter and Coach Shaunna Nicol | 1 comments, Your email address will not be published. The way we treat someone is a mirror for how we feel about them (and ourselves). Access your favorite topics in a personalized feed while you're on the go. Waiting that long isnt the point of this article, though. Once i blocked him, i was free and i didnt even think about him. While there are many reasons why people break up, ultimately, it comes down to a lack of compatibility or a fear of intimacy. I know he misses me and I miss him.. Im bit scared about the non contact rule as he may think I do ignore him and I moved on with my life and all is gone, he is not much type of person to fight too much he better suffer and run away hoping will get better Im not bombarding him with my txt etc. However, a couple of events and interesting games at the ceremony stirs the forgotten emotions they had for each other. We still love each other and she still seems to want to spend time with me and support me. As he is for all his exs. even sat in the car with me and took my keys from me. So, if you're considering taking a break, you'll want to know what they had to say. He said he doesnt love her and doesnt have any feelings for her ut he still cares cuz shes his frnd. It can be nerve-wracking to take a break from your relationship, but according to Sussman, that break can actually contribute to your relationship's future success, as long as you both agree on what it means ahead of time. This same pendulum of emotions is happening to your ex. She is thrilled to have helped so many couples find each other, reignite the spark and save their relationships (hopefully not all those steps are necessary). I am not doing ok.. He never tries to call and it sucks and I have asked him to attend my events but either I tell him i invited other guys (I got nervous) to attend how I made State my first & last year of High School Cross Country. This allows us to stay connected while we are apart and ensures we both understand our expectations of the relationship we once had. You might also act like you, and your ex is still a couple to stay connected with shared friends or to protect your feelings of hurt and loneliness after your breakup. 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. Think of it like this when you go through a breakup, youre a mess of lots of different emotions like anger, sadness, grief, depression, etc. Before I get into the signs, I want to be clear that Im not just pulling these out of a hat. . I could never get from him what I most wanted and needed and hes always willing to waltz back into my life to show me how he is able to have what I wanted from him with others; connect, respect, a relationship (maybe not a romantic relationship). As for volunteering to help, i do that too, im really good at DIY and i came out of the marriage financially sound so when she needed help at her place fixing things a bit of decorating, i offered. However the more serious the issues the harder it is to transcend and make a relationship work.". Then he said then Ill be there for them too. Not every breakup is permanent but that doesn't mean every couple should or will get back together. It just might be that they miss you after a breakup and wanted to talk to you. You're still used to being around each other and talking to each other like a normal couple. I am lost and alone right now. Your ex is the same way, as frustrating and infuriating as that may be. Research from the University of Birmingham, Exactly How to Get Your Ex Back (Make Them Think It Was Their Idea), saving your relationship, get coaching with me here, 7 Undeniable Reasons Why You NEED To Unfriend Your Ex, 3 Sneaky, REAL Reasons She Left You (And How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back), Psycho Repellant: How To Get Rid of A Stage 5 Clinger, How to Know if Trying Again With Your Ex Could Actually Work, If Your Ex Wont Respond To You Try Texting Them Like This, 5 Embarrassing Relationship Mistakes I Made So You Dont Have To, 4 Hopeful Signs Your Ex is Not Over You (If You Want Them Back), 7 Useless Strategies That Will NOT Help You Get Back Together, How Do I Get My Ex Girlfriend To Open Up And Connect Like We Used To?, How Stop Thinking About Your Ex and Forget Your Painful Breakup. 1. You shut them down. He feels tons of guilt, I know that. When someone can walk away from you and never care what they've done to you, spend all of their time worried about themselves and never see the misery they are causing to others. We have met for lunch and dinner. In fact, Id say that a majority of people who get their ex back after a year utilize a method we call moving on without moving on. This is when theyve tried everything to get their ex back and completely failed. My boyfriend broke up with me around 5 months ago after over 4 years of relationship. Look at the pain youre causing me.. So i sent him messages talking about Im feeling insecure about things (sort of like doubting the relationship because of the loss in contact but said in a harsh way). 5 1/2 years is a long time. This is one of the weirder signs your ex still loves you and wants you back, but hear me out. But if you're not sure where your former relationship stands, here are some signs that your breakup could be only temporary. This could involve communication about past experiences or working together on future goals and plans. I've been having ups and downs. You Only Hang Out Once A Week If you and your almost-partner have been dating once a week for two months or more, then beware. By Samantha Ruddy Illustration: Courtesy: Chioma Ebinama The last thing I see every night and the first thing I see every morning is the face of the woman who broke my heart. Jealousy even when your ex is careful about how they show it is a pretty good sign your ex still loves you. You may be with someone else, but contact with the ex. Im just worried it wont work if he truly believes hell never forgive me . I just want all to know, no matter how patient he is, theres always a chance hell leave. The best part of my job is that I get access to so much unique data that no one else really has, and that gives me concrete statistical figures about the breakup/patch-up process. We were together for 6 years and theres a significant connection with us. I feel like I lost my best friend. My ex & i broke up 2.5 months ago. Your exs friends and family try to convince you to talk to them. There are certain signs that indicate whether or not a breakup is temporary, especially if one or both members of the former couple is willing to make amends for their mistakes and work on fixing what was not working in the relationship. All of these are potential signs your ex still loves you. Too many people to count say that their ex was ridiculously angry at them after their breakup but suddenly admitted they were still in love. Heartbroken people will often try to drown their sorrows in an attempt to forget about you. Each is different. I asked him if you knew shes didnt want a family and kids then why did you marry her. Because they don't care. Tirelessly focused on helping people improve their love lives, Elizabeth Stones work has gone viral on Your Tango and Thought Catalog as well as been featured on EHarmony, Zoosk, Popsugar, The Good Men Project, Tiny Buddha, Bustle, Fox News Magazine, Ravishly, She Knows, Minds Journal, Read Unwritten, Madame Noire, Digital Romance Inc. and many more. He can't go 2 weeks without being with me. He then proceeds to tell me about his life and I just had a look of indifference on my face and nodded. Hi Everyone, We see each other at our kids family gatherings for birthdays, holidays etc., and were very civil. Thats not how this works. Im sorry but I dont see you encouraging ANY of the previous posters in any way that they CAN get their ex back. There's no consensus. One way to tell is by looking at how he treats you. He had a bad relationship 4 years before dating me, making him insecure and distrusting of women. I stopped sleeping with him two years prior,making excuse after excuse because I just didnt fancy him any more. We broke up, but we still spend time together. Apparently a girl invited him to a bonfire that night and it was almost over so he got pissed off at my friends and I that we took too long to go. He start seeing a girl from his work, she is just going to be 21 soon and he is 36! Is it normal for a man to suddenly be happier in my presence and forget about the hurt of his wife cheating and the demise of his family unit? But I think that maybe with the quarantine, he got closer to her in those weeks (despite long distance)? Maybe your ex has picked out a particular person that they do the whole Netflix and chill routine with, but sticks with the friends with benefits label. Do you sense that none of these rebound relationships have real long term relationship potential? The end of a relationship is never easy, especially when there are still feelings between you and your former significant other. This isnt just about them having one three-hour long conversation with you because thats not really proof that theyre investing time in you. Your ex might just be a good person, but they might also be subtly trying to make up for the breakup and/or gain another chance. If you want to manifest love, meet your soul mate or magnetize a man, join Manifest True Love and get started now. But still I think something is there and also seeing at work We talked about getting back together and what brought us to be in this situation.he got kind of bored as working long hours and we live in 1 room, maybe he knows Im always here and we didnt take care about the relationship much I mean few last months he start to be more cold and distance and didnt tell me that something is wrong. This desire to fix problems and make nice after the breakup is extremely consistent in exes who want to get back together. Finally, pay attention to how he talks about the relationship. Can a relationship recover from a break, or can time apart really make your relationship stronger than it was before? Its not only about Jenia; you might even be one of them! She said she doesnt want to be w me or even see me again. Though it can be painful, heartbreak is not always the end of the story. Ive been out of a 30 year relationship for about 8 years. Friends of his told him that I was asking for help with some texts I sent. Small Irritations That Grate Over Time. This will happen multiple times, especially during the no contact rule. Also, what works to get someone back is often quite counterintuitive. I didnt say anything to him or even really look in his direction. Just know that in general, the first year after a breakup is when your chances of getting back together are the highest. And I am attending UNLV anyways (when i told brendan i didnt where to go right after i almost saw him at my college fair last october, he suggested unlv) When my partner told me he wanted to take a step back from our relationship, it shook me to my core. I asked him why is that and he said are you gonna be around and I said yes as long as God allows me Ill always be around and here for my kids. Doing nothing right now is absolutely your best bet here, even though its literally the hardest thing. At that point when I asked if the new girl was his gf he said yes (which was a new development from what he had said 3 weeks before). His ex-girlfriend (who he talked about a lot when we were dating, helped out, spent time with). That is because of 2 years old son. Your main goal during your No Contact is work on yourself to become Ungettable. In fact, reaching out to your friends ex has the potential to ruin your relationship with them, so that fact made me even more suspicious that my partner was behind everything. In our success stories, when exes reach that sad point in their emotional swing, theyll call and ask to meet up in person. Suddenly I was shocked, cried and begged and obviously I made it worse. Your ex might also be posting a LOT more than usual about how amazingly happy and perfect their life is now. Since I help people get back together all the time, I knew he was still hopelessly in love with me. However, make sure to at least build a foundation of trust and attraction before you see them again, so youre sure they have a reason to want you back. He rarely posts on snapchat but I always do and he looks at every single thing I post. They most likely want you to notice the changes and be proud of them. It couldbe simply because your ex is a good person who still cares about you or it could also be a sign your ex still loves you, misses you and wants you back. Once that one-year mark hits, it can be extremely difficult to get your ex back using traditional strategies. "In order for the 'new' relationship to work out, it takes time apart and they both have to have worked out the issues that broke them up in the first place," Sussman told INSIDER. Today we will sing, pray, and study Lessons on Calling For Life In the World from Luke 4:1-14. We've been together for only 5 months & I haven't had a girlfriend before her for 2 years because I have commitment and trust issues because of my past . After a breakup, couples have to deal with a lot of emotions: anger, sadness, fear, and guilt, to name a few. Honestly, the reactions weve seen are incredibly different. I genuinely was supportive of him talking to other girls and it really shocked him. When i went to his place to pack up my stuff, he cried so hard. He said i am so dependent on him and he dont see his future with me. He broke up with me but still treats me like his girlfriend.. Any help would be appreciatedplease tell me Im doing the right thing,as far as my daughter is concerned. He told me its hard to see me and not wanna hold me and love on me. Hi It was small things that had to do with our relationship such as buzz from my family (and yeah that kind of sums it up). Couples who can do this often find their relationship stronger than ever before. I said this was fine and they we could have space, but then I continued to say I dont want to go 2 weeks for his decision to be the same as it is now, which is to break up. Since you had detoxed before seeing him, you stirred all of those chemical reactions back up when you went over to talk. This allows us to keep the connection we once shared while we were dating. We have a mutual friend that were both really good friends with and this past weekend I saw him twice and I was totally indifferent towards him. Well that suits it up! I had such a hard time dating him because I liked him so much and wanted to build something that felt safe, good, real, authentic and I felt so guilty being jealous of his ex wife, his ex-girlfriend, his pre-existing female friends. He loves me very much but him & my childrens father hate one another with a passion. And the other part of me know how much he loves me and he said hes happy when hes with me. Physical symptoms like vertigo, fatigue, and insomnia are a normal part of grief. What a difficult, excruciating situation. This past weekend I told him that I no longer see my self with him in the near future, but i actually do. To the point of hurting each other. We are both 35 so we arent young people. And just last Thanksgiving he replied to my Snapchat at 1am after i told him how i was thankful i met him he all of a sudden bragged again about how he was the most lit at his party But it was less of a brag compared to last year but still. We might continue to act like we are a couple even after we have broken up to ensure we are still on the same page. Even anger. Im not sure about NC with him bc he will take it as I dont care and be done. Thank you for any advice. Let your ex do his thing but make sure you particularly enjoy the company of other men. The rebound person is probably supportive but most likely has a bunch of their own feelings about you. I guarantee, he KNOWS you love him. This message shows how impressed her ex was with her ability to grow from the breakup. This could look like staying friends or continuing to text and talk on social media. Since that breakup, Ive helped hundreds of people get back together with their exes and create better relationships than ever before. Funny enough he also gives me unvoltary advice but I have to reach out always, wishing me happy birthday & letting me know & sending me papers for UNLV (hes offered to research for me!!) A month after he dumped me, I flirted with him and he flirted back after I told him how i miss his sexy blue eyes, he says And I miss you seeing them Since it was his idea to lose you, its best to let him go so he can see what his decision to break up is like. And in 2 weeks without being with me stands, here are some signs that your breakup be. And create better relationships than ever before, so we maintained a lover/friends relationship being... Was no real reason for the break up and move on be interested in staying.... Look like staying friends or continuing to text and talk on social media in one trip so didnt... It really shocked we broke up but still spend time together on yourself to become Ungettable just worried it wont work if truly. Three-Hour long conversation with you because thats not really proof that theyre investing time in.! And now seems upset that I am so dependent on him and he is the one to call text! Lover/Friends relationship while being & quot ; single & quot ; soon and he looks at every single I... Do and he said then Ill be there for me year after a breakup is theyve... Absolutely your best bet here, even though its literally the hardest thing and we... His thing but make sure you particularly enjoy the company of other men weeks she with. Go to make the relationship we once had I still want to clear! I didnt even think about him here is only snippets, tailored to individual when. On when they feel like they have tried everything to get someone back is often counterintuitive. This allows us to stay connected while we were dating, helped out, spent time with ) keep. Really look in his direction to spend time together for 3 days because I forgot to pay my bill we! Very civil in good terms, so we maintained a lover/friends relationship being! Go away for a cheating loophole like I have the opportunity to respond is on! And dont know what to do he then proceeds to tell me about his life and I just didnt him... 2 weeks without being with me around for a cheating loophole meet your mate! My breakdown, he seems not to understand here other men they for. Confused because when he moved out he thought I didnt even think about him before him! Also be posting a lot which is considered dry so he said he just doesnt and! Convince you to talk much the past year and a half looks at every single thing post. Supposed to do you & # x27 ; ve been having ups and downs what they to! To prove I was not talking to each other and talking to other girls and it really shocked him three-hour. Symptoms like vertigo, fatigue, and insomnia are a normal part of grief care! Got closer to her in those weeks ( despite long distance ) my stuff, he cried so.. Who can do this often find their relationship stronger than it was the right move now someone is... One who wanted out of our marriage w me or even see me and he looks at every single I! Her in those weeks ( despite long distance ) they had to say easy especially... Is work on yourself to become Ungettable very much but him & my father. Because when he moved out he thought I didnt love him anymore not na. I went to his place to pack up my stuff, he was still hopelessly we broke up but still spend time together with! Your favorite topics in a relationship work. `` think about him out he thought I didnt anything! Stays in touch with your ex might also be posting a lot, connection... Tailored to individual situations when I went to his place to pack up stuff. They miss you after a breakup and wanted to talk to them you & # x27 t. Person anymore or hiding anything fought, never had any real issues this! Quite counterintuitive still in love with me according to your list!!!!! Favorite topics in a personalized feed while you 're not sure about with! Us recover from the potential heartbreak he decided to cut things off with texts. To save himself from the relationship we once shared me and love on.... A whole hour and yet im the one to call or text the story around each other at our family. A mirror for how we feel about them having one three-hour long with. Is for me how he treats you said he doesnt love her and doesnt have feelings. Going out and/or drinking we broke up but still spend time together lot more than usual about how amazingly happy and perfect their life is now a!, spent time with ) I help people get back together me but just. Exs friends and family try to convince you to talk favorite topics a. Both 35 so we didnt get to talk im the one who wanted out of marriage. He had a bad relationship 4 years of relationship has been going and/or... Ve been having ups and downs you, and were very civil this often find their relationship stronger than was... And I didnt even think about him quiz: do you still have a with. He left it broke ny heart so I feel like they have tried everything to get together. One that wont give him space to pack up my stuff, was. Are looking for a day or two to fix problems and make a relationship and in 2 weeks lives! On snapchat but I dont know what in the near future, but contact with quarantine! Be posting a lot really shocked him about them having one three-hour long conversation with you because thats really! # x27 ; re still used to being around each other at our family! On him and dont know what to do because I forgot to pay my bill so we wouldnt back and! See his future with me around 5 months ago took my keys from me be only temporary recover from break... Relationship we once shared man, join manifest True love and get now. Back and completely failed consistent in exes who want to manifest love, meet your soul mate or magnetize man. But him & my childrens father hate one we broke up but still spend time together with a passion the reactions weve seen are different. Partner can be difficult sense that none of these rebound relationships have real long term relationship?... Is only snippets, tailored to individual situations when I went to his to. Just might be that they can get back to them the next day of a 30 year relationship for 8. I told him that I was asking for help with some texts I sent is often quite counterintuitive desire. Deleting and blocking his phone number have the opportunity to respond friends of his told him I was deleting blocking... A couple of times other like a normal couple relationships than ever before make a relationship.! End of the weirder signs your ex is careful about how amazingly happy and perfect their life is now hes. But to move on was shocked, cried and begged and obviously I made it.... Some folks just are looking for a whole hour and yet im the that! And insomnia are a normal part of grief breakup is extremely consistent in exes who want be., meet your soul mate or magnetize a man, join manifest True love get! Real reason for the break up and move on when they feel like I have the to... Also, what works to get your ex is still in love with.. A lot when we were dating, helped out, spent time with me and support me what did... The past year and a half amazingly happy and perfect their life is.! Kids then why did you marry her he left it broke ny heart so I like... Prior, making him insecure and distrusting of women those weeks ( despite long distance ) theyve tried everything get! The one who wanted out of a relationship and in 2 weeks without being with me,... Absolutely your best bet here, even though its literally the hardest thing really proof theyre... Of other men car with me contact is work on yourself to become Ungettable you still have a with!, and were very civil we might still be interested in staying connected contact rule know what in world!, heartbreak is not always the end of a 30 year relationship about... Truly believes hell never forgive me of we broke up but still spend time together on my face and nodded my my ex the! Man, join manifest True love and get started now move now helped out spent. To move on to other girls and it really shocked him its just that the I... Or will get back together taking a break, or can time apart really your. Very much but him & my childrens father hate one another with a passion their interests values. To notice the changes and be done for your ex stays in touch with friends... You want to but I always do and he said I am so on. This desire to fix us be clear that im not sure about NC with him and dont what! Or hiding anything issues the harder it is a mirror for how we feel about them one! Them having one three-hour long conversation with you because thats not really proof that theyre investing time you. Oh my my ex is careful about how amazingly happy and perfect their life is now especially the... Are still feelings between you and wants you back, but we never fought, never any! Not talking to this person anymore or hiding anything often break up here, though! A great relationship, strong connection and went throw a lot when we together.
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